Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts

Apr 17, 2012

Traumatic Brain Injury - Part V - Prevention

Every 16 seconds in the U.S., a person suffers a TBI. This entry is related to how to PREVENT being a statistic. For a traumatic brain injury (TBI), there is no cure, only prevention. What can a person "do" to prevent this? Most things are common sense, but my suggestions focus on falls because they are the biggest cause (see TBI Part II Causes). These suggestions have been collected from various websites and from my own personal experience. Links to all of the other websites appear on the TBI entries I've made (click on the Misc/Brain Dump page above for related posts or the related links at the end of this post).

Falls can occur in nearly ANY part of daily life, and we rarely pay attention to each and every move we make. Here are some common sense things that can help you prevent a fall and possible TBI:
  • Use handrails on stairways and look at the steps when walking 
    • Stop reading the mail or magazine 
    • Look for items that have been left there
  • Provide lighting on stairs for people with poor vision or who have difficulty walking
    • A nightlight at the top or bottom is a good idea at night
  • Sit on safe stools and chairs. 
    • Wobbly chairs collapse, stools tip, throwing you to the floor
  • Do not place obstacles in walking pathways (such as stairs, hallways and traffic patterns)
  • If a cabinet door is open on a cabinet in the kitchen and you drop something on the floor, be careful standing back up or your head may impact against the bottom of the open door
  • Use a mat/rug on bathroom and kitchen floors (near the tub/shower and sinks)
    • Those 2 floors are notorious for getting wet. You do NOT want to slip on one (that is what happened to me). 
    • Trying to get back on your feet isn't easy and you can repeatedly fall, making the injury even worse.
The second largest part of our lives that cause falls, are sports and physical activities. Here are some suggestions focused on them. Most sports (football, baseball, soccer, lacrosse, etc.) have specific requirements for the gear that must be worn to protect the various parts of the body. I am focusing on the points below because they are about helmets, which help prevent TBIs. I'm not here to explain the pros or cons about helmets, simply provide you with some suggestions and information.
  • Always wear a helmet when on a bicycle, motorcycle, scooter, snowmobile, jet-ski
  • State Helmet Laws
    Some Local Helmet Laws
    White states have no known helmet laws

    • Some states have laws about helmets for under 18 age people riding bicycles and this site [link] shows info and has a lot of good links about other issues surrounding helmets. The image to the right is an overview of the states that have known/reported laws.
  • Wear a helmet while skiing, snowboarding, skating and skateboarding
  • Wear a helmet when participating in contact sports
    • Not just in "official" ones, but even during the weekend pick-up games
I mention contact sports in the last bullet because I am a ref for a roller derby league and have been at countless bouts where a skater (or even ref) has been knocked down and hit their head on the floor. Helmets are required to be a competing skater or ref (yes, they sometimes get taken out). Basically what a helmet does in any of the activities mentioned above is PREVENTS a fall from being a severe TBI and reduces it to a mTBI, more commonly known as a concussion.

Overall, use common sense in your daily life and when taking part in any physical activity... your head will thank you.

Related Links

Apr 8, 2012

Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) - Part IV - Recovery & Rehab

This entry is an overview of what is involved in recovery and rehab for a TBI victim. Chances are that you know someone that has experienced a TBI. Peppered throughout the information are links to sites that contain more details on each topic.

Obviously the medical team will address any physical injuries that require attention. Something to keep in mind about that though, is that a mild TBI (mTBI) or closed head injury may not be diagnosed until well after all of the physical injuries have been tended to. Refer to the TBI Part III - Types for more info about those.

Before recovery/rehab can occur, there has to be a diagnosis of the type or level of TBI has occurred. The victim may be on life saving medical machines, medicated and the evaluation for brain injury will be hard to determine until the victim is physically stable and conscious. Remember, a TBI is not "visually apparent" because it happens inside the head. This is most apparent in a "closed head injury" (explained in TBI Part II).  As explained on one website [click HERE] there are several steps in the "method" of diagnosis:
  • A detailed neurological examination will bring out evidence of brain injury.
  • Brain imaging with CAT scan, MRI, SPECT and PET scan.
  • Cognitive evaluation by a neuropsychologist with formal neuropsychological testing.
  • Evaluations by physical, occupational and speech therapists help clarify the specific deficits of an individual.
Once a diagnosis has been made, a plan for recovery and rehab can be penciled on paper. Of course it will cover any of the physical injuries, but the "length" of the rest of it depends on the individual victim and the success they achieve. It becomes a thought that "only time will tell." For a concussion or mTBI, the victim is typically discharged within a time span of a few hours up to a day after the injury occurs. For more severe types, they may be held in the hospital until they are physically stable and then transferred to a rehab center that specializes in TBIs. For example, I was in 2 different hospitals 2,100 miles from "home" before I was stable enough to transfer to a rehab center that was closer to my house.

So, the question that comes to mind of the family or friend of a TBI victim, is "OMG, what happens at the rehab center?!?!" I'll summarize what can be found on this website [link]. I'm glad you are reading this, but not to be sarcastic, if you are ever checked into a TBI center, you won't remember this or be aware of it until you recover. This is more for the family and friends of a victim. I've highlighted the key points of what happens after the physical things are tended to and the victim is finally in a true TBI center. I've put my personal observations after.

Understanding Traumatic Brain Injury
Similar to the acute care facility, the TBI patient will be cared for by a team of professionals who specialize in the care of trauma victims. Their goals are to:
  1. Stabilize the medical and rehabilitation issues related to brain injury and the other injuries.
  2. Restore lost functional abilities.
  3. Provide adaptive devices or strategies to enhance functional independence.
  4. Begin to analyze with the family and the patient what changes might be required when the person goes home.
Each day, the patient will participate in therapy. Initially, the patient may require staff assistance for even the most simple activities:  brushing teeth, getting out of bed and eating.  The patient also may require staff for safety because there is a risk of falling, eloping (trying to get out of the hospital to go home) or getting hurt. The patient may be confused and forgetful.

The Rehabilitation Team
The Physiatrist is the team leader in the rehabilitation program. The physiatrist is a physician specializing in physical medicine and rehabilitation. The physiatrist will assess and prescribe the treatment and direct the team.

The Neuropsychologist will assess patient's changes in thinking and behavior. Changes could include:
  • Poor memory, attention, concentration, decision-making
  • Impulsivity, disorientation
  • Language and communication abilities
  • Inability to speak or understand when spoken to
Many patients are unaware of the changes in the brain and how those changes affect their daily lives.  A patient may not understand what has happened and may be distraught by being away from home.

The Rehabilitation Nurse assists patients with brain injury and chronic illness in attaining maximum optimal health, and adapting to an altered lifestyle. The focus of nursing care is on:
  • Sleep pattern disturbance
  • Impaired verbal communication and comprehension 
The Physical Therapist job is to minimize or overcome paralyzing effects related to the brain injury. PTs will assess:
  • Balance, posture, strength
  • Increased sensation of sensory-motor activities
  • Pain management
The Occupational Therapist assesses functions and potential complications related to the movement of upper extremities, daily living skills, cognition, vision and perception. OTS  help determine the best ways to perform daily living skills including showering, dressing and personal hygiene. The OT also will look at skills to prepare the patient for a return to the home. These skills include:
  • Cooking, grocery shopping
  • Banking, budgeting
  • Readiness for returning to work by assessing prevocational and vocational skills
Now a personal explanation of being released and being allowed to return "home." The victim of a TBI will only be released from the rehab center once they can demonstrate that they are capable of performing all of the above (and more). They will also have to schedule the follow up assessments, to make sure they are progressing down the path of life, and not experiencing a "relapse." It takes months to "recover" from a severe TBI, but years to "rehab."

Personal Observations
You have to go through physical therapy for a few reasons. Your muscles may be weak from being immobile. Second point is because of how your brain is "misfiring." Physical therapy is to get your muscles active again, but also because the damage to your brain means that it doesn't send the signals to the muscles to be active. You will walk A LOT, perform hand/arm/leg exercises, etc. I studied tai chi, qi gong, do yoga, walk my dog about 20 miles per day, and became  a roller derby ref. I stay very active.
Another thing not discussed openly is trying to "elope" or "get away" from where they are. When you become conscious again, and don't know where you are or why you are there, the survival instinct kicks in. You want to "flee." But know, the TBI victim may be restrained to prevent it. It stops more injuries from occurring until the person is able to safely conduct a "normal" demonstration of getting through the day. A lot of TBI victims may spend some time cuffed or strapped to their bed to prevent them from trying to get away until they are conscious enough to understand that they shouldn't.
Another point is related to rehab exercises to regain the ability to communicate. They will track your ability to communicate, but the don't really provide therapy to assist. You have to do it on your own. I suggest playing cards, doing crossword puzzles, sudoku, word finds, read the newspaper, etc. Just letting a TBI victim watch TV or listen to the radio doesn't do it because it doesn't challenge the brain.
I highlighted the rest of the points just to give you a summary of what a TBI victim will be analyzed on before they are "released" to go home. What isn't really "discussed," is what your restrictions will be when released. You may not be allowed to drive, go up the stairs, use hand tools, be alone in the bathroom, go anywhere unsupervised, cook, clean, etc. It all depends on what level of success you have at the rehab center and at follow up appointments, before they begin to remove your restrictions..
Another thing not mentioned in rehab is how some other things in your body may change. They will tell you that your sleep patterns may change (you may need less or more), but they don't tell you that your metabolism and hormone levels may also change. The only way they mention the hormone changes is to say that "you will be more impulsive and/or uninhibited in your expressions of your feelings." Yeah, sorry to say, but THAT affects everyone around you. Same with metabolism. You may need MORE or even maybe LESS meals.


I could probably write a novel about my personal experience and observations, but I just wanted to provide some overviews about traumatic brain injuries and concussions so more people would begin to learn more about them. There are 1.5 million cases every year... that's a LOT. And those are only the counts of the victims that are checked into a hospital. If you receive a concussion, go to the ER, and are released shortly after, you don't count because it isn't reported. So, ask yourself, how many concussions occur that aren't counted in the stats? Hmmm... makes you wonder... Just be careful out there...

Related Links:
 

Apr 4, 2012

Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) - Part III - Types

While this [link] explains the "effects" of a TBI, I feel that it better explains the 2 types (mild & severe) of a TBI, which is why I'm summarizing it and providing some personal observations after that. Yeah, this entry is going to be LONGER than normal because this is what needs to be most understood about TBIs.

Most are unaware of the range of a TBI or its overwhelming nature. TBI is common, and will be overlooked initially when the medical team is focused on saving the person's life. TBIs can be categorized into 2 levels: mild and severe. Let's talk a little about them. For more information, click on the links above.

Understanding Traumatic Brain Injury
A TBI is classified as mild if loss of consciousness, confusion and disorientation is shorter than 30 minutes. The victim may experience headaches, difficulty thinking, memory problems, attention deficits, mood swings and frustration. Even though this type of TBI is called "mild", the effect on the family and the injured person can be devastating. Unfortunately, the family and friends may be the recipients of the frustration of the victim, but they don't realize "why" they are. And, the victim doesn't realize that they are venting on them.

The most common mTBI is a concussion. Even though most sports require pads and helmets, it still occurs. Wearing a helmet helps prevent 60% of mTBIs, but they can still occur. I'll discuss more about helmets in the prevention entry. A key point to understand about a concussion is that the effects can last up to a year or more after the injury.

Common Symptoms of Mild TBI (mTBI):
  • Fatigue, sleep disturbances, memory loss, dizziness/loss of balance 
  • Irritability-emotional disturbances, depression
Other Symptoms Associated with Mild TBI (mTBI):
  • Nausea, loss of smell, sensitivity to light and sounds
  • Mood changes
  • Slowness in thinking
These symptoms may be delayed days or weeks before they show up.  They are subtle & often missed by the injured person, family and doctors. The victim "appears" normal. Family and friends notice changes in behavior before the injured person realizes there "is" an issue.

Observations
Frustration at school, work or when performing daily tasks occur. Trust me, I know... I've gone through this and continue to work through it. Unfortunately, it affects those around me too, and I'm not always aware of that until they point it out to me.

Understanding Traumatic Brain Injury
TBIs result in permanent neurobiological damage that can produce lifelong deficits to varying degrees. Severe brain injury is associated with loss of consciousness for more than 30 minutes and memory loss after the injury longer than 24 hours. Survivors may have limited function of arms or legs, abnormal speech or language, loss of thinking ability or emotional problems.

The impact of a moderate to severe brain injury can include difficulties with attention, concentration, being distracted easily and impulsive responses. Other key effects of a severe TBI are:

Speech and Language
  • difficulty speaking and being understood
  • slurred speech
  • speaking very fast or very slow
  • problems reading or writing
Sensory
  • blurred vision, problems judging distance
  • decrease or loss of hearing, ringing in the ears (tinnitus)
  • loss or diminished sense of smell
Social-Emotional
  • Lack of motivation, irritability, aggression
  • Depression
  • Denial/lack of awareness
Observations
Another key thing not mentioned on most websites about TBIs is prosopagnasia (commonly called "facial blindness"). This is when a victim cannot recognize someone just by looking at their face. I know I suffer from this because I once spent an half an hour visually "searching" for a family member that had been standing 20 feet away from me the whole time, but I didn't recognize them. Yeah, this will probably be another blog entry.
The abnormal speech & slurred speech occur more often when the victim is tired or stressed. I have had several people approach me and ask me if I was drunk because my speech was slow, slurred, and not easy to understand. No, I hadn't been drinking, but the connections between the brain and the voice are stressed more, so it "sounds" like that I am.
When in a tired, stressed, anxious, or distracted environment, I have been overly impulsive (verbally) to things. A victim can lose their mental "filters" and end up saying or doing things they wouldn't "normally" have done before. It is because the connections between emotions and expression are stressed more than normal, and the person is not performing a mind check before they utter or do something. And when they DO utter them, they probably sound "drunk."
Sometimes there is a disconnect in the brain of a victim because they "know up here" what they are trying to communicate, but the signal never makes it to the tongue. There are times that I know what I am thinking, but the actual words don't come out of my mouth, and that leads to frustration when you have to ask someone what the word is for something as simple as a "doorbell," or "remote control." It leads to more frustration, but also personal embarrassment, which typically leads to even more emotional feelings related to self-esteem.
Sometimes the victim has more of a ROM drive brain but not a RAM drive brain (this is related to memory). I can tell you about things I cooked over a camp fire 2 decades ago, but I can't remember if I had breakfast this morning. Sometimes I wish I could use a PC code of "C:\del *.*" on my brain and just start over.

Part IV will be about recovery & rehab.

Related Links:

Apr 1, 2012

Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) - Part II - Causes




pie chart of causes of traumatic brain injury
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)
As I mentioned in my TBI - Part I entry, this second part is about what can cause a traumatic brain injury. First, some facts. Followed by personal observations.

The graph to the right (based on a CDC report) shows that the top 3 causes of a TBI are from car accidents, falls, and struck by/against. According to the CDC (United States Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), there are approximately 1.5 million people in the U.S. who suffer from a traumatic brain injury each year.  50,000 people die from TBI and 85,000 people suffer long term disabilities.

This is higher than the combined incidence of Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, and multiple sclerosis.

Brain injuries occur more often than breast cancer or AIDS. One out of every fifty Americans is currently living with disabilities from TBI.


The following information (from HERE), explains the "mechanisms" of the top 2 causes of TBIs. I'm only covering the top 2 because they are the most prevalent. I've highlighted the key points and my personal observations appear below that.
Mechanisms of Injury
These mechanisms are the highest causes of brain injury: Open head Injury, Closed Head Injury, Deceleration Injuries, Chemical/Toxic, Hypoxia, Tumors, Infections and Stroke.
1. Open Head Injury
  • Results from bullet wounds, etc.
  • Largely focal damage
  • Penetration of the skull
  • Effects can be just as serious as closed brain injury
2. Closed Head Injury
  • Resulting from a slip and fall, motor vehicle crashes, etc.
  • Focal damage and diffuse damage to axons
  • Effects tend to be broad (diffuse)
  • No penetration to the skull
Personal Observations:
Some things that aren't mentioned above that were my personal observations about TBIs:
It make sense why "falls" and "traffic accidents" cause TBIs, because the head is prone to striking something hard. What came to mind about the "struck by/against" was mentioned in my TBI Part I entry, that a friend's nephew was playing lacrosse when it happened.
My TBI was in the "falls" category. I was at a work conference and stepped out of the shower because I left my shampoo on the counter. I fell on the wet tile floor... repeatedly... According to the doctors, 6-8 times. My recommendation is to always be safe in the bathroom.
A side thought & some reading on websites confirms that a TBI is part of the Shaken Baby Syndrome. Think about it...when shaking a baby, their brain is bouncing around in there and it kills brain cells when that happens. My recommendation is to not do it.

Related Links:

Mar 31, 2012

Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) - Part I

Recently a friend told me that the nephew of a friend suffered a traumatic brain injury (TBI) while playing lacrosse. It made me cringe a lot, not because of the sport being played, but because I've also suffered a TBI. Hence, a series of blog entries related to a traumatic brain injury (TBI), one of the most misunderstood injuries in North America.

As a technical writer, I will keep things factual but I would be remiss to not include some personal observations about my experience. Bear with me... One of the best websites that explains a TBI in a little more detail than I am going to do, is the Traumatic Brain Injury site.

So, the point of this entry is to explain "what" a TBI is. Future entries will cover causes, types, effects, and recovery/rehab. Rather than reinvent the wheel, this is what the above site & links below explain. I have highlighted some key points, and added my comments after the definition:
Understanding Traumatic Brain Injury

     Traumatic brain injury, often referred to as TBI, is most often an acute event similar to other injuries. That is where the similarity between traumatic brain injury and other injuries ends. One moment the person is normal and the next moment life has abruptly changed.
     In most other aspects, a traumatic brain injury is very different. Since our brain defines who we are, the consequences of a brain injury can affect all aspects of our lives, including our personality. A brain injury is different from a broken limb or punctured lung. An injury in these areas limit the use of a specific part of your body, but your personality and mental abilities remain unchanged. Most often, these body structures heal and regain their previous function.
     Brain injuries do not heal like other injuries. Recovery is a functional recovery, based on mechanisms that remain uncertain. No two brain injuries are alike and the consequence of two similar injuries may be very different. Symptoms may appear right away or may not be present for days or weeks after the injury.
     One of the consequences of brain injury is that the person often does not realize that a brain injury has occurred.
DEFINITION:
There are several ways to describe brain injuries.  The brain is enclosed in the bony vault of the skull.  The cerebrospinal fluid surrounds the brain and, most of the time, protects it from impact with the skull.  If there is a rapid force applied to the skull or rapid deceleration of the head, the brain may strike the inside of the bony vault.
Brain tissue may stretch or tear because of the rapid movement.  This can injure the nervous tissue of the brain directly.
Personal Observations:
Some things that aren't mentioned above that were my personal observations about TBIs:
You can't "SEE" a TBI when it occurs inside the head. There aren't any scars (other than how it was caused or hospital equipments used). For some TBI injuries (like mine), there are no visible scars related to it.
A TBI will not only affect the victim, but their family, friends, significant others, employers / employees. They have to adapt to the changes that you've gone through, and be supportive during your recovery/rehab. BUT, you need to ready to accept that the TBI has changed THEIR life too.
The victim of the TBI will not realize it happened when it did. In my occurrence, I didn't know I had a TBI until several weeks after it happened. Why so long? I had to come out of my coma and begin to recover enough to understand what all of those people standing around my hospital bed were even talking about.

Related Links:

Mar 28, 2012

Ties - A Dying Tradition

While they aren't as popular today as they used to be, I still feel that every man needs to know how to tie a tie. Face it, a man should wear a tie to a wedding, funeral, science fair, interview, and just because you should "dress for the job you want, not the one that you have." I was honored to learn it from my grandfather and recently had to pass that knowledge on to someone "in the next generation." LOL... yeah, that was an experience that I'll always have in my mind.

It wasn't until recently that I learned the "name" of the knot my grandfather taught me, as this website explains. It was the "Half Windsor Knot." Because of the Tie-a-Tie website, I've learned how many other ways that I can make my silk tie look good. But, I am now going to share with you a video that explains how to do it.



Yeah, I have to comment on my opinions about ties.  A key one is to AVOID the clip-on ones. Just take a little time to learn something in life, don't just take the path of least resistance.  This will serve you more later in life. I learned to tie a bow tie for my prom instead of just clipping it on. Some events in your life will always be in your mind if you PERSONALIZE them. Make them a memory, not just an action. I've also written a blog entry about How to Travel and Store A Tie.

Anyway... refer to the links above about ties, join me as a member, and check out the Art of Manliness link to the right as a reference about how to impress your date...

Mar 21, 2012

St. Patrick's Day Poem

St. Patrick's Day 2012 is a few days past us, but I would be remiss to not share a poem I came across on another website about the myths about that holiday [link] related to my Corned Beef & St. Patrick's Day post. Below is a poem written by Frances Shilliday that summarizes my entry. Frances was kind enough to grant me permission to publish it on my blog (yeah, I asked permission because as a writer, I can't morally cut & paste to plagiarize someone).


GOOD GRIEF - NOT BEEF!
 

I just want to put something straight
About what should be on your plate,
If it's corned beef you're makin'
You're sadly mistaken,
That isn't what Irishmen ate.

If you ever go over the pond
You'll find it's of bacon they're fond,
All crispy and fried,
With some cabbage beside,
And a big scoop of praties beyond.

Your average Pat was a peasant
Who could not afford beef or pheasant.
On the end of his fork
Was a bit of salt pork,
As a change from potatoes 'twas pleasant.
This custom the Yanks have invented,
Is an error they've never repented,
But bacon's the stuff
That all Irishmen scoff,
With fried cabbage it is supplemented.

So please get it right this St. Paddy's.
Don't feed this old beef to your daddies.
It may be much flasher,
But a simple old rasher,
Is what you should eat with your tatties.


Feb 2, 2012

Tat Thoughts III

My chest now...
Previously I made entries about Tat Thoughts, and Tat Thoughts II. A comment on why I choose totems as ink symbols. Tats and ink to me, mean that you are trying to express what you feel and are on the inside, in your spirit, with the people on the outside. All 10 tats that I have are an expression of something in my spirit, with people that happen to ask about why I got them, and why "that" symbol.



Rooster Head Ink
I mentioned in Tat Thoughts why I got the Rooster tat. That is my Chinese astrology sign, since I was born in 1969 (click HERE for more info on the Rooster). It describes me as a personality perfectly! The design was based on a drawing by Elektra Q-Tion, and then supported heavily by Christy at Blue Flame with the needle. Christy is an amazing tattoo artist, she agreed to come in on her day off because she loved the symbolism. I love her attention to detail, and embracing all of my ideas. Her attention to detail appeals to my sense of being a perfectionist, and her love of roosters and winged symbols is par none (if you play golf, you know what I am saying). I was honored that she was willing to come to work on me and to spend several hours tattooing me because of the symbol that I wanted.

American Goldfinch Ink
I followed it up a few months later by getting the American Goldfinch (also known as the Yellow Finch) because it is yet another of my animal totems. While in the process of getting an idea for my next animal totem, I did copy and paste a lot of info from the web. If any of this is your writing, let me know and I'll give you credit or delete it, depending on what you tell me to do.

When a Yellow Finch is spotted it is a sign that enthusiastic times are head with days full of bright, high energy. Finches fly, typically bobbing and weaving through the air. Watching a Finches free-form flight can fill you with a sense of freedom and happiness.

Native America Indians called the Finch the "bird of happiness." They thought the bright yellow color of this bird was a gift from the gods and would bring bright joy and freedom into their lives. They also thought the song of the Finch was the sound that announced the upcoming bounty of the spring season.

If a person has been concealing his or her creativity from the world, Finch may be the sign to start making their value more vocal and available to the public. The Finch song can lighten your heart and lead you on a bouncy path of creativity.

Finches are also sociable creatures, so a Finch Totem could be a signal to get more involved with social activities.
Black and yellow are the colors of the archangel Auriel. These colors in meditation and ritual are used to invoke that aspect of this being that oversees the activity of nature spirits--the fairies, elves, and devas.

The presence of goldfinches usually indicates an awakening to the activities of those beings that are normally relegated to the realm of fiction. Goldfinch can help you deepen your perceptions so that you can begin to see and experience the activities of the nature spirits yourself. This deepening of perceptions is reflected in the black cap--awakening to that which is normally hidden from view.

Goldfinches are usually permanent residents, and in those areas where they are found, you can also find the fairies and the elves. Goldfinches like border areas and young brush growth found at edges and borders. Edges and borders are intersections where there are natural doorways to that other realm of life.

Even their nesting habits reflects this link to the border areas, the 'Tween Places.' They build their nests in a fork or on an outer branch high in a tree. It is usually made of thistledown. Thistle has a long association with nature spirits and the healing aspects of animals. Blessed thistle was once used to invoke the god Pan. Thistle has been a symbol of endurance. It is through endurance and persistence that we can open to the Realm of Faerie once more. Goldfinches are birds that can help us connect with those nature spirits that can show us how to heal animals--wild and domestic.

Goldfinches are rarely silent. This in itself is a reminder that Nature is speaking to us constantly and that we should learn to listen and communicate with it from all levels. It reflects that the nature spirits are around us at all times.

In winter, the male loses its black cap, and the bright yellow turns to an olive yellow. This also reflects the connection of goldfinch to the world of the nature spirits. In the winter, they withdraw, working more within the earth, rather than in the outward expressions which are more evident in the spring and summer. It does not mean they are not there, but rather that they may not be as easily perceived.

The goldfinch also has an undulating (an up and down movement) flight pattern. This rhythm and pattern can be used in visualization to help loosen the subtle energies of the arua and facilitate leaving the body. The wave pattern also reflects the ability of a goldfinch to lead us to the inner and to the outer realms, from the human to the Faerie, from the physical to the spiritual.

Understanding the value of change, Ability to resolve family conflicts in a healthy manner, Creating balance in dealing with different peoples, Understanding the power of voice.

Jan 31, 2012

Roller Derby Valentine's Day

If you are looking for some roller derby related Valentines, click over to REM DESIGNS DeviantArt site and order some... I was working on this entry this morning, but she got hers done first, so I copied and pasted it below. Elektra Q-Tion's blog entries about roller derby can be found by clicking HERE or via a link in my list over to the right.

Roller Derby VD

I was inspired to create some roller derby Valentines.  They are free to download at this site.  Please give me credit for them if you post them anywhere.

Couple skate


For the girls we love and hate.
For the penalty box peeps.

For your lady, refs.
Inside line blue
Inside line Red
Stinky Gear
Booty block
Cheatin' on your derby wife.

Jan 12, 2012

Ditto Casserole

I called it Ditto Casserole, because it was due to combining some other casserole recipes on my blog, all into one. But, I would have to say that this was the most tasty one yet. I probably "over wrote" the instructions, but it is easier than it reads...


Ingredients:
  • 1 15oz. black beans
  • 1 cup elbow macaroni pasta
  • 1 can salt-free tomato sauce
  • Old Bay Seasoning to taste
  • 2 hot dogs
  • 1 1/2 cups shredded taco mix cheese
 Directions:
  1. Simmer the beans (undrained) while you boil the water for the pasta
  2. Prepare the elbow macaroni pasta according to the package instructions
  3. While that is going on, chop up the 2 hot dogs (cut in half lengthwise twice, then chop)
  4. Preheat the toaster oven to 400 F
  5. When the pasta is done, rinse and drain
  6. Pour the tomato sauce into the 2 quart saucepan from the pasta
  7. Return the pasta to that pot, and drain/rinse the beans & return that to the pasta pan
  8. Stir well, sprinkling Old Bay (or the spice of your choice) over it while stirring
  9. Add chopped hot dogs, and stir well again, adding more spices/herbs
  10. Pour into an 8x6x2 oiled casserole dish, and bake in the toaster oven for 15 minutes
  11. Spread the cheese on top of that baked casserole & return it to the toaster oven for 10 mins
Serve with a side of vegetables, a salad, and a desert... enjoy... serves 4-6 depending on how you cut it...

Jan 10, 2012

Signs of a Hippie

Russian Rainbow Gathering. Nezhitino, August 2005
Image via Wikipedia
There are a lot of things that come to mind about what a "hippie" actually is. I believe there is a spirit of being a hippie in all of us. How others "define" you depends on how deep you impact them. Most people only have their understanding based on what they've "heard." I'm expressing what MY experience and perspectives are.

Enhanced by ZemantaI was born a month before the first Woodstock in 1969. Which means that I was raised by  people that lived in the key defining age of being a hippie. I just want to define that I was alive when the term "hippie" became expressed. This is about opening your mind to another person's perspective.

Being a child in the early 70s impacted me so deeply that even to this day, I can't ignore the signs of what I learned then about the hippie life. The parties that my Mom had on the weekends still haunt me to this day. No, I don't dress with the clothing that was popular then, but I have had very long hair, have pierced parts, don't wear dye ties but want to be comfortable. But it is a little above and beyond that, as a "lifestyle" that we all accept in our opinions.

A "hippie" is defined as (according to Dictionary.com) as:

hip·pie


a person, especially of the late 1960s, who rejected established institutions and values and sought spontaneity, direct personal relations expressing love, and expanded consciousness, often expressed externally in the wearing of casual, folksy clothing and of beads, headbands, used garments, etc.

Times and people change, this isn't a CURRENTLY definition. Drop the part about what they wear, but they still espouse the parts about institutions, values, spontaneity, love, and consciousness.Which is where I am. I guess I'm a spiritual hippie.

How I live now, daily and spiritually, that espouses it:
I still separate the colors of the glass bottles that I take to the recycle center
I use a "Can Crusher" on all of the pop cans I collect, so I can save them to take to the scrap yard
I use a mulch blade on my mower to replenish the soil 
I compost my kitchen scraps to reduce what I put in the garbage
I use canvas bags (that I bring) at stores when I purchase things, bag the items myself to cut down on wasting trees and oil for the bags that they provide
I use CFL instead of incandescent bulbs to cut down on the energy needed to light them, saving coal
I express my spontaneity each and every chance I can. It might get me in trouble, but I express it
I am in love and am very tactile
I consciously approach everything in life by determining the outcome of my actions

Peace out...

Jan 4, 2012

Artful Decorations

I am single and live in an apartment but am no longer a teenager, so I no longer use heavy metal band posters to adorn my walls. I am also blessed in life to have a very close friend that is an art & graphic designer. Her site is REM Designs (yeah, click on it, I triple dog dare you). She has a lot of prints available, does commissions, writes her own blog, and is an awesome, amazing person... just drop her an email or message, and she'll work with you to get you what your soul and eyes desire. Her prints are available in various sizes, and she has a LOT more on her site. The most striking series is her drawing of the zodiac signs. I use her art for Cancer as my avatar icon on Facebook.

I've used the following images from her website as prints to be the inspiration, color, decorations, and art in my apartment.



Jan 3, 2012

Toska

A friend of mine recently posted on Facebook a word that expresses a very deep spiritual feeling and it made me stop instantly because I hadn't heard that word since I was about 14 or 15. Of course, as most of my posts point out, I was with my grandparents. I can actually remember the discussion I had with my grandfather about this particular word.

My grandfather (who was Greek) and I were tromping through the woods behind their house. They were VERY deep woods, but we were heading towards the powerline cut because both sides of the cut were completely covered with berry bushes, and it was time to go pick several bushels (I'll discuss that in another post) so we could make pies.

As we walked, he looked at me and said "you look troubled, what are you feeling?" I explained that "I just didn't sleep well last night. I don't know why. My mind just wouldn't stop. And now, I feel sad." He was quiet for a while and we journeyed farther into the woods. He was quiet, and didn't ask me any more questions. He knew that my mind was still whirling trying to figure it all out. It was processing what I was "feeling" and "what caused it," but it was getting nowhere. I was pretty much left alone to process the spiritual side of myself, and my grandfather was the kind of man that just let it step forward on it's own path. He was there for guidance, and teaching. But, when the emotions where on the overwhelming side, he could tell. And he could put it all into a perspective that I could embrace.

As the morning wore on, and I picked a seemingly ENDLESS amount of berries, the sun warmed my back. And I absorbed the energy of the heat. It warmed me from the inside and restored the stability that my spirit needed. Each handful of berries that I put into my basket reassured me that "by tonight, this will be delicious." So, my spirit was lifted.

I looked down the path to my grandfather, and asked him "why did I feel sad even if nothing happened?" He said, "There is only one word that explains it... toska." He explained it to me as "a feeling of sadness and pain, way down on the inside...but you don't know what has made you feel this way...your brain and your soul are just having a conversation about something that you feel and something you don't realize you know. It will pass when you find the positive moment of your path."

I have to admit, that at my age, that didn't make a lot of sense to me. But, it kinda did. By the time the journey into the woods ended, I was stabilized, and we had nearly 3 bushels of berries.

All these years later, when I read toska on that Facebook posting, it brought back that memory with my grandfather, but also made me look it up. Just to "define" it a little better. It is best explained by Vladimir Nabokov in the following quote:
"Toska - noun /ˈtō-skə/ - Russian word roughly translated as sadness, melancholia, lugubriousness.
"No single word in English renders all the shades of toska. At its deepest and most painful, it is a sensation of great spiritual anguish, often without any specific cause. At less morbid levels it is a dull ache of the soul, a longing with nothing to long for, a sick pining, a vague restlessness, mental throes, yearning. In particular cases it may be the desire for somebody of something specific, nostalgia, love-sickness. At the lowest level it grades into ennui, boredom."

 And...I'll just leave it at that...

Dec 30, 2011

Homemade "Hamburger Helper" Casserole

Hamburger Helper
Image via Wikipedia
I always liked easy casserole recipes yet liked the consistency and taste of Hamburger Helper. So, in an attempt to reduce cost, scale it for myself AND better the nutrition options, I made it my hobby for a month to create a recipe that met all of those things. I have achieved that, IMHO. I'll keep it simple as an entry so you don't have to scroll too much. But, I seriously encourage you to do this.

Ingredients:
  • 1 lbs. ground meat (beef or even Italian sausage)
  • 1 1/2 cups elbow macaroni
  • 1 can Campbell's Tomato soup
  • 4 oz. of a package of shredded cheese (your choice of flavor)
  • Italian seasoning
Directions:
  1. Boil the water, and make the macaroni according to the instructions on the box.
  2. Brown the ground meat of your choice at the same time.
  3. Preheat the toaster oven to 375 F and oil an 8x6x2 Pyrex casserole dish.
  4. While draining the macaroni in a colander, pour the tomato soup into the stockpot you used.
  5. Sprinkle as much Italian seasoning into the soup for the taste you want.
  6. Return the macaroni to the stockpot with soup.
  7. Drain the browned meat, and put it into the stockpot too.
  8. Stir well.
  9. Pour that mixture into the 8x6x2 Pyrex casserole dish and even it out.
  10. Place that in the toaster oven for 20 mins.
  11. Slide the dish out (using oven mitts) and cover it evenly with the shredded cheese.
  12. Noodles & browning
  13. Return it to the toaster oven, and bake for another 8 minutes.
You would have enough to serve at least 5 people with this, but that also means you have enough leftovers if it is just you. Yeah, it is actually very awesome, and I make it at least once per week. It is easy to make, and tastes great. You could use any other seasonings/herbs based on your choice, but this is AWESOME!
Finished casserole

Breakfast Sandwich

Egg rings
I bought these the other day, and after reading all of the comments, I do suggest that you dip them in olive oil before using them. Fortunately, I learned a lot of Italian cooking while growing up, and have a lot of it in my pantry.

BUT, my point of this entry is about how awesome these are if you use them properly. My son was with me last weekend, and usually eats Pop Tarts for breakfast, but as his father, I strove to provide him a better option, without having to run to McDonald's for a meal. I made it at home.

Breakfast sandwich
Because they are a new item in my kitchen, I poured a raw egg into one ring, and poured a scrambled egg into the other, just to see the difference. I then took each result, put it on an English muffin, with cheese and a home-made burger, and served it.

End result? We will occasionally have "breakfast for dinner."

I served it with a side of hash brown patties. Score one for me.

Dec 28, 2011

Night Driving

Driving at night in rain or snow storm really is challenging, to say the least. Not only does the weather diminish your ability to see in front of you, but so do the headlights of cars coming the other way. They are almost BLINDING as they reflect directly into your eyes. A couple of tips about driving at night can be found at Road & Travel Magazine and the NYS DMV driver's manual, but I'm sharing the best tips.
  • When another car is approaching, look to the right (by checking the passenger side mirror or looking at the line on the side of the road)
  • Dim your dashboard lights as low as possible
You are "supposed" to check all of your mirrors every few moments so you are aware of what is going on behind or beside you. Diverting your eyes to the right when a car is coming the other way, you save your eyes from reacting to the amount of light that is impacting them, so when you return them to the front, they don't have to "readjust."

Dimming your dashboard lights reduces the amount of light impacting your eyes. When driving, especially at twilight, you rely on your peripheral vision. The dashboard dials impact that. By dimming them, you can SEE them when you are checking the speedometer, clock, or radio station, but they won't distract your peripheral sight while you are actually looking at the road in front of you.

'77 VW Rabbit
I learned this trick from my grandfather decades ago when he let me drive his car (a '77 Volkswagen Rabbit). He shared this with me because he learned it by being a belly gunner on a B-17 Flying Fortress during World War II. They dimmed the lights on the plane (cockpit & belly gun controls) when they flew at night so they could see out of the windows better, achieve the mission that they were on, and spot the enemy faster. Hmm...that makes sense. Driving a car is not about being the first to cause an accident, but about being the first to spot a situation that you can AVOID.

B17 Flying Fortress
I learned a LOT from my grandfather about life in general, but I still adhere to the tip of dimming my dash lights and look forward to passing this advice on to my son when he starts driving too.

I wish that my Toyota Highlander had a belly gun... sometimes other drivers piss me off.

Dec 22, 2011

HEE HEE HEE

Hello...my name is Dozer. I was named after the word "bulldozer" because I always plow through things that I find inconsequential, and because most often I can be found "dozing." As you can see by the pic, I have commandeered the master bed where I live. I let others sleep here, but it is MINE. But I digress, those will be other posts...

I've commandeered my buddy's Mac to post some of MY thoughts on a blog, but didn't want to bother creating my own. Yeah, without thumbs it is kinda hard to work the mouse or touchpad. It is hard to bother filling out all of the registration info...so I am using my buddy's blog.

I call him my buddy, because he didn't "sire" me (so he isn't my "daddy"), and he doesn't "own" me. He and I connected at a point in my life where I needed someone like him, and he needed someone like me. He welcomed me into his life...without restriction. He wrapped his arms around me, kissed my forehead, and said to me, "welcome to your future...you are loved...live as if you've never lived, love as if you've never been loved, but always experience things, as if you haven't experienced life itself..." That's always stuck with me, which is why I am using his Mac...and why I have the suspicion that he is a hippie (that, plus all of the patchouli incense that he burns).

Life with him for the last few years has been interesting. When I connected with him, I was deaf (still am), was 25 pounds overweight, could barely walk, and only had 6 months to live. Within the first year with my buddy, I had lost 15 pounds, had 6 steel pins inserted into my hips and rear legs so I could walk, and learned a lot of American Sign Language (ASL) so someone could "talk" with me... After my surgery, he became my buddy when he slept with me on a sleeping bag, on the floor of his dining room (so & BECAUSE I couldn't walk up stairs), for several months. Because of that, I can now commandeer a bed as my own. As he lays his arm on my back while we slept, I know that is why our souls continue to melt together.

But, AGAIN, I digress...the last year has been particularly interesting for me, and even for him. We moved out of our house into an apartment (thank goodness he chose one with a single floor, with no stairs), and he has begun cooking again (YUM)...and has joined a roller derby team [NEO Roller Derby], which in itself, brings a lot of GREAT things to my life. Again, that will be ANOTHER blog post when I can grab computer time on his Mac when he isn't paying attention or is at "derby practice."

I'm going to have to start posting more blog posts about DERBY when my buddy isn't around...maybe when he goes to the practices and things that he does, I will...if I'm not dozing...stay tuned...and:

WATCH THIS SPACE